Release

As the seasons change and time moves on I remain caught In this trap of not allowing you the freedom to leave.If i release you from these walls within me, will I be in better shape or will I completely fall to pieces not having you near me in the form of 'thought'? Would amnesia be a good thing? I often ask for a pill which eradicates memory..however I'm not so sure that is the answer...I'm not at peace and never will be until I can reach the ultimate end to this realm as i know it.
I need to tell my self to stop picking up the pieces to a dream that was and has long forever gone.My world needs to be offered out to you...yet Its too difficult to unchain my self from the safe walls of the confined hell and the toxicity of foul stench I breathe....peeling back the layers makes for good drinking fluid right about now ....The things I have wanted the most in this life were given to me and taken ...so I deal with this playground of regret amongst other poisons and things burn right beneath my skin....A part of me is dead...